What Image Are You Projecting
Gary Simpson
I want you to think about something for a few moments.
Do you have any perception about what sort of image
you are projecting? I’m talking about the personal
or professional image that you are presenting to the
rest of the world. When we perceive others we do it
through four of our five senses:
- Sight
- Sound
- Smell
- Touch
The fifth sense, "taste", we will set aside because
it is irrelevant to this subject. But we will include
an intangible quality, a "sixth sense", so to speak,
which we will identify as "something extra". What I
refer to here is that vague notion we get about somebody
which we are unable to quantify. It is an all-round
subconscious combination of everything else that we
perceive about the person. We have all felt it. We all
project it. It’s the thing we speak of when we say or
think the words:
- "I feel as though I can trust this person" or
- "I think I feel safe in this person's presence"
or
- "it seems as though I have known this person a
long time" or
- "I just don’t feel comfortable when he (or she)
is around" or
- "this person makes my skin crawl."
Call it gut feeling, animal instinct, intuition or
whatever you want. We all possess it and we all project
it. Some are more receptive at what comes in and others
can mask what goes out. But there are signals. So
let's examine each of the above attributes briefly
to see what sort of "persona" or image you are projecting
for others to "read".
1 – Sight. What do you see when you look
in the mirror? What do you look like? Not everybody
has movie star looks or a perfect athlete’s body.
However, we should all be making the most of what
we have got. There is simply no excuse for an unkempt
appearance. Are you a man who only shaves every second
or third day? If so, why? Are you a woman who has
unruly hair? It has been proven that people judge
you mostly by what they see. If you make a poor initial
visual presentation then you have to rely on everything
else to work overtime to overcome it. Consider this.
Think about your lawyer, accountant, doctor or any
other "professional" person. When you first met that
person how did they present? Were they well groomed
and in fine clothes? Almost certainly they were. Now,
every time we see that person we judge them by that
first presentation appearance. You may see your accountant
one weekend down at the hardware store in his or her
grubbiest work clothes – but you still have that image
of them in their professional attire. Let’s reverse
that. Let’s assume that you bump into that person
in the hardware store, you strike up a conversation,
during which, they reveal to you that they are an
accountant. But you see them in their filthy weekend
work gear. Is it convincing? You decide to visit them
at their usual place of work at a later date. Hey
presto! Out comes this person looking very professional.
Is your mind in conflict? The point I am making is
this – the first impression is the lasting impression.
When you see somebody for the first time and they
are professionally attired, that is the way you invariably
categorise that person from that point on – even if
a subsequent meeting shows them wearing lesser clothing.
It just doesn’t work in reverse. My point is – if
you want to project a certain image – dress for that
image. But that is not to say that you need to wear
your best clothes all the time when you are away from
your work. The above example was just to illustrate
my point.
2 – Sound. What words do you use? Do you
speak appropriately and knowledgeably for your profession.
Are you prone to "um" and "er" your way through conversations?
Do you think before you speak? Is your verbal language
sprinkled or even littered with profanities or expletives?
Gutter language is a sure way to lose customers and
clients. So are sarcasm, racial prejudism, sexual
connotation, rudeness, ignorance, criticism and a
host of other poor language traits. Do you revise
and edit your written language in letters or emails
before you send them – particularly when you are in
conflict with a person or corporation? Do you screen
your writing for blatant errors or possible misunderstandings?
Being pleasant but firm creates a much better environment
for resolution than a harsh and angry tone. Do you
wait before you send your mail and revisit your words
before posting? Do you put yourself in the position
of the receiver of the correspondence?
3 – Smell. A tough subject to deal with. I
will be blunt. Do you smell? Many people have deficient
nasal receptors. Their sense of smell is either diminished
or non-existent. Often such people can reek of offensive
body odour simply because they are unaware of it themselves.
Some people have heightened nasal receptors. Their
sense of smell can be so sensitive that all sorts
of odours cause them discomfort. Therefore, if you
are a man who drowns himself in after-shave you might
save yourself a lot of money by being less liberal
with it. Similarly, women who walk down a corridor
and leave a trail of perfume in their wake might also
like to follow this advice. A hint of after-shave
or perfume can be refreshing. A miasma of it can be
just the reverse.
4 - Touch. In today's society you had better
be aware that excessive touching and feeling is completely
unacceptable. If in doubt, you should offer and accept
your hand in a hand-shake only. Many people find it
very offensive when personal contact is made. If you
are in the habit of giving people a hug just make
sure that the "hugee" is amenable to the hug from
the "hugger". All of the above add up to what can
be described as a "general personal aura". You can
send and receive these auras. They form part of that
unquantifiable quality that we know of as the "sixth
sense." Be aware that many of the subjects that I
have described above can be modified to suit specific
locations, customs, beliefs and relationships. There
is no universal law. Awareness and common sense are
the key. There are several books, which go into great
detail on these matters. One such book is "Body
Language" by Allan Pease. If you have any
difficulty locating this book you can always request
it by its unique code (ISBN 0 9593658 0 X).This is
an excellent reference source on many non-verbal gestures.
It certainly makes for interesting reading.
By being aware of the signals that we send out when
we deal with other people we can improve the way we
interact with them. These are skills which can be
learned and they can greatly increase our results
in personal and business relationships. These skills
are important because the greatest element in personal
contact with your clients and customers is communication.
Poor interpersonal skills will eventually cause a
breakdown in confidence which will manifest itself
in declining sales. The most successful people in
any business are always the communicators. If you
are an employee and you want your salary to increase,
work on your communication skills. If you are a business
owner and you want your turnover to increase, work
on your own communication skills first then show all
your employees how to do the same. The image that
you project in the marketplace will directly affect
your "bottom line". Think about it. What image are
you projecting?
About the author: Gary Simpson is the Course
Co-ordinator for the "Life, Journey, Destiny - Personal
Development Home Study Course" and the author of "How
to Stop Wasting Your Life and Start Getting What You
Want". His email address is budo@iinet.net.au. The website containing
this article and others is located at Motivation & Self Esteem for Success.
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